Monday, September 14, 2009

I know I have probably said this before but we are at our 4 month mark with Lily and it just is hard to believe. It feels like she has been with us forever. I can hardly remember the day when she wasn’t here as a part of our family. Things continue to go so smoothly. We still cannot believe how fortunate we are to have this little girl. She has adjusted so well to her new life.

One thing about an older adoptive child we have learned is the wide range of maturity they have. At times Lily seems so old and John will say, “are you sure she is only 7, maybe she just quit growing and she’s really grown”. When she does something so smart we will tease her and ask her if she is really 13, she will laugh and laugh, she knows she is so smart. She is so clever, she notices things most adults don’t, let alone kids and she remembers everything. I finally have a way to remember where I put something; all I have to do is ask Lily. She is always thinking of others in a mature way. She takes care of everything and is very responsible. Then on the other hand she can totally behave like a 2 year old child. Out of nowhere some little thing will set off a tantrum and she will cry and have a fit. Unfortunately we haven’t learned just yet how to deal with them. We want to set firm boundaries for her like we have with our other children but yet be sensitive to her past. I must say I struggle with how to handle them. I never want her to think I don’t love her but I don’t want to worsen the behavior either. I am just very glad these tantrums are rare.

 Lily started school in August. After meeting with the school principal, the ESOL teacher, the guidance counselor and a kindergarten teacher, we all decided it would be best for her to start in Kindergarten. She likes school a lot and it only took her about one week to adjust to being away from mommy. She would get in the car after school and just talk and talk with such excitement about all that had happened. She has been singing songs, bringing home papers and talking about all her new friends at school. She took her lunch for the first few days but came home and begged for school lunch. We said sure and so now she is trying all types of new foods. Every day she will come home and tell me what she had for lunch. She loves going to art, music, PE and computer and I never have to remind her what days she has to wear tennis shoes for PE.  Going to school has really helped with language development. She understands most of what we say (though still speaking simply and often in incorrect grammar) and talks non-stop. One day she came home so excited because she met a China girl in her school who speaks Chinese, the ESOl teacher had arranged the meeting between them.

This coming week will be Lily’s birthday. This has been much anticipated and she has talked about it for months. She wants to have a big party with a lot of people. She selected Tinker bell as the theme and Lily’s Fairy Godmother will make an appearance at the party.

Over Labor Day Weekend we took the kids to the beach. This was Lily’s first beach trip with us. She told us she did go to the beach in China but did not get in the water. She loved the beach here and had a great time. She learned to Boogie Board, she looked for shells and built numerous sandcastles. She finally got her ears pierced. She has asked me nearly every day since she was home when she could get her ears pierced. I surprised her and took her to the mall at the beach to have them done. She didn’t flinch and is so proud of her new pierced ears.  

She is still very attached to me. She honestly is always within arm’s reach if I am home. Sometimes it drives John crazy because he wants her to go play so we can talk but she just insists on being near me. Every day at school she draws a picture for me and presents it to me like it is very special (it is). The pictures are all very similar, just like the one that was in her referral information we received so long ago. There is a house, flowers, trees, birds, a sun, clouds and a little girl standing beside a house. When I first saw that picture so long ago I thought how it must represent how bad she wanted a home and a family. This week she changed the picture. Now instead of a little girl standing beside the house all by herself she draws all seven of us inside the house. I didn’t think of the significance right away. It almost makes me cry. Yes Lily, you have a home and a family that loves you, FOREVER.