Friday, November 30, 2012
DAY FIVE (MOMMY AND DADDY BREAKTHROUGH DAY) WITH OUR DAUGHTER

Today was absolutely wonderful! Mei-Li woke up about 0730 on her own. She had a big smile and was happy to see us. We hugged and kissed on her before changing her diaper and giving her a good morning bottle. What a wonderful way to begin a day. This start set the stage for the rest of the day. Mei-Li played happily before and after breakfast. She actually played all the way to naptime. Today’s playtime was different in that she was interacting with Fel more and running around the room laughing. She is one smart little girl. Okay, I know every parent says that, but she really is I’m not just saying it! We played stack the Play-Doh containers, stack the blocks with the Play-Doh containers, knock everything down and start over. Fan each other with the room “Do Not Disturb Sign.” And our all-time favorite, push the hotel room phone speaker button…over and over and over and overJ. She is actually mumbling something over and over in Chinese.

Later in the afternoon, daddy and Mei-Li started to play kids games on the iPad. She loves the farm animal app and the dolphin sound is her favorite. She hits dolphin button over, over and over again while laughing. It’s the cuteness thing to watch. Mei-Li actually sat on Daddy’s lap today to play with the iPad. Hurrah! I thought I would get Daddy’s iPad when he gets an upgrade but it looks likes Mei-Li will get one first. She already knows how to scroll an iPad at two years old. It has to be from watching daddy. I cannot believe that the orphanage handed out iPads to the children.

Although Mei-Li’s playtime and interaction was a breakthrough, the biggest most important breakthrough of the day was our parenting lesson for the day. It is how we handle nap/bedtime. In the adoption process, we are trained that adopted children should not be left to cry themselves to sleep. They need reassuring because they probably did not get this in an orphanage setting and they need to overcome the feeling of abandonment. So, over the past two days we have been struggling with naptimes/bedtimes. We tried to comfort/hold her; yet she still cried herself to sleep. So, the internal struggle of what to do, we know she needs sleep, she needs routine and consistency but we need avoid the crying herself to sleep, as this is reinforces the abandonment and can be counterproductive to bonding. The question is how? Daddy used the most annoying little show on TV. Just prior to Mei-Li nap or bedtime, reduce room stimuli, turn down lights, put Mei-Li in the center of the bed AND put on a Teletubbies video. Daddy finds these characters most annoying but loves the staubsauger (vacuum cleaner).

(14) “Doh!!!” Says daddy….Teletubbies!

She interacts with the video, plays calmly on the bed in between us and then quietly falls asleep peacefully. Wow, what a difference! We did this at nap time and bedtime today and it worked beautifully. Thank you Daddy, this was all his idea!

There one more parenting lesson today. Mei-Li sleeps hard, but she is also a little wiggle-worm. Throughout the night she will sleep over the entire bed, by making little movements in 360 degree pattern. Daddy learned this lesson tonight, as he got up and she took over his spot (see the picture we posted.) Mommy also learned that when Mei-Li take over daddy’s spot, daddy takes over Mommy’s spot, if she’s out of the bedJ.

(15) Do not get out of bed or you may lose your spot to Mei-Li AND daddy.

Tomorrow we have a Medial Appointment to get TB read. Please continue to pray for us and Naomi. Not only are experiencing the blessings and miracles as a result of your prayers but also Naomi family is! Thank you for all the prayers and support! We love you guys! God is good!

“A child needs both to be hugged and unhugged. The hug lets her know she is valuable. The unhug lets her know that she is viable. If you’re always shoving your child away, they will cling to you for love. If you’re always holding them closer, they will cling to you for fear.”
Billy Graham