Tuesday,
February 7, 2012
DAY FOUR
"In
love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through
Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will."
Eph. 1:5
"Adoption is wonderful and beautiful and the greatest
blessing I have ever experienced. Adoption is also
difficult and painful. Adoption is a beautiful picture of
redemption. It is the Gospel in my living room. And
sometimes, it's just hard." (Kisses From Katie pg. 72)
It's official! What we have known in our hearts all these
months became official on paper today. Ellie is ours!
What a difference in that Civil Affairs office between
yesterday and today. Yesterday was a terrified Ellie who
wanted no part of her mama. She would writhe and arch her
back as I tried to sit her on my lap. And today we had a
very, very sad little girl, who ONLY wants to be on her
mama's lap. I am so very thankful that at least she finds
some comfort in my arms.
I'll back up a bit to yesterday as I posted before we went
to dinner. At dinner last night (in the hotel) Ellie was
more animated than we had seen her. And we even saw a
couple of very brief smiles. There were some big tears,
though, as mama tried to place her in the high chair so
she (mama) could eat her dinner. Unfortunately Daddy's
arms are a scary place to be right now and the highchair
was scary as well, so I quickly pulled Ellie out of the
highchair and put her right back onto my lap and
immediately the tears stopped, and all was right with the
world. After dinner we headed back to the room and got
Ellie ready for bed. We decided not to bathe her, as I
knew she would be very scared of the tub, so we put her
into her pajamas and I fed her a bottle and she drifted
off to sleep very quickly. I held her a bit and then tried
to move her to the crib, which made her VERY unhappy. And
after a couple of tries, I decided just to lay her down.
She cried for about 2 minutes and was OUT until about 7
this morning! Ooooh, what a happy mommy Ellie had! She
seems to have gotten my memo on sleep! She awoke this
morning with a dirty diaper, so things are fine in that
dept.
This morning began with a very shut down girl. It is so
very heartbreaking to witness. Again, though, I am SO very
thankful that she allows me to snuggle her, kiss on her,
and comfort her. After breakfast we headed back to the
Civil Affairs office. Ellie's nannies were not present
today, as they couldn't get train tickets back to Chenzhou
today, so they had to leave yesterday afternoon. And that
was probably better for us anyway. Our family photo, was a
traumatic experience for Ellie, as was putting her red
footprint on the paper. Nevertheless, we accomplished what
we needed to do and walked out with our baby girl
"officially" ours. It was fun to run into another family
from our home town at the Civil Affairs office. What a
small world!
After our paperwork, we headed back to our hotel room and
have been here for the rest of the day. We managed to get
just a couple of smiles from Ellie when I had the bubbles
out. Afterwards we Skyped Emily, and Ellie fell asleep in
my arms while we were talking. It was her nap time, so I
layed her in her crib, which again woke her and made her
unhappy. In a matter of minutes though, she fell back to
sleep and is still sleeping now. I thought I better take
advantage of my arms being free and get our post written!
Tonight we'll walk to a nearby restaurant for dinner, and
our guide, Amy, wrote out what we'd like to eat in
Chinese, so we shouldn't have any culinary surprises. And
afterwards we'll attempt THE bath.
It has been a much different trip this time. It's so quiet
with just the 3 of us. We're staying in the room a good
bit more, touring less and really just focusing on Ellie.
Seeing how traumatized she is, I am so thankful we don't
have our exuberant 4 with us. I think Ellie would be
completely overwhelmed my them, and in fact, at this
point, I am a bit worried about our arrival home. It's
still very early though into Ellie's adjustment, and I
know that things can and will probably change. But for
now, she seems to need things quiet, slow and simple. And
that's just what we're able to do right now. I must say
though, that we are really missing Emily with the camera.
We have been lacking in the picture dept. on this trip.
Please do pray for Ellie's heart. I see wonderful signs of
her attaching (though it is anxiously right now) so at
this point I don't have worries about that. But her
sadness. She sits hunched over with her eyes downcast most
of the time. It is so very hard to watch our precious
daughter struggle this way.
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those
who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 |
Our Somber Girl
The First Dinner
Red Footprint!
Signing Paperwork with Amy
Bubbles Make Me Smile
Naptime! |
